'It's always weird when guys follow you in the bathroom and try to

THERE'S an unintentionally amusing moment in Planet of the Apes. When Mark Wahlberg turns chimp heroine Helena Bon-ham Carter and vows, "I will show you something that will change your world forever", audience titters are induced not by the scenario, but absolutely from the knowledge that Wahlberg once played a man with a 13-inch penis.

He may have starred in Three Kings and The Perfect Storm; he may now be battling belligerent monkeys; but, no, it's still 1997's Boogie Nights they all come back "I'm very proud of that film, but it's not the one I want to be remembered for," Wahlberg chuckles. "It changed my life in a lot of ways, some of which I could do without. It's always weird when guys follow you in the bathroom and try to check you out. (He mimes someone giving a furtive sideways glance at a urinal.) It's like, 'Come on guys. Give me a break'."

In Boogie Nights, Wahl-berg's role as an amply- trousered porn star was something of an allegory to his own rise - kid from the wrong side of the tracks finds stardom; bad-boy rap-per Marky Mark turns A-list film star. Exuding a quiet, dumbstruck machismo, Wahlberg is often described as the new Steve McQueen.

In Planet of the Apes, he's stepping into Charlton Hes-ton's size nines.

In his next film, a remake of Charade, he did enough to convince filmmakers he could swan around Paris essaying Cary Grant. Wahlberg laughs: "I'm trying to remember who it was who said that I was nothing but a bullshit artist."

Today, amid the genteel surroundings at the Dorchester Hotel, Wahlberg could con anyone - resplendent in white dress-shirt, gold collar-studs and immaculately creased black

trousers. Were it not for his prison-yard physique, you might venture his sensible short back and sides had been combed by his own mother, perhaps with a last-minute spit-wash to make him presentable. He's got manners too. Softly spoken, attentive, polite.

Though it doesn't sit quite right. On close scrutiny you can see it.

There, around neck is a tattooed rosary, culminating in an inked crucifix between the bulging pecs which strain at the stitches. There are other etchings lurking beneath, usually airbrushed out of photos. On his left shoulder is a profile of Bob Marley.

On his right are inscribed two sets of initials (his parents'), and a date: 6-5-71 ("You know, in case forget my birthday"). Here is an actor who'll never be able to knock five years off his age.

MARKING time is important to the 30-year-old.

Lest we forget, his adolescence, in a rough Boston neighbourhood (Dorchester, ironically), included a spree of drug-dealing and car theft which saw him - aged 16 spend ing 45 days in a state penitentiary for vicious assault. His travails were enough to jolt him in the direction of more gainful employment - first with band Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch (riding on the coattails of brother Donnie's New Kids on Block); then, famously, the official face - nay "lunchbox" - of Calvin Klein underpants (both sexes of the fey fashion world going into a flap about this ex-con, posing in his knickers).

Wahlberg is still embarrassed about that episode, but claims such opportunities got him out of the gang mentality for good.

"The most courageous thing I did was to stand and say, 'I'm not gonna run with you guys'," he says.

"Once I did that, everything seemed to fall in place." You can take the kid out of the ghetto, but you can't take the ghetto out of the kid. all the "ridiculous amounts

of money" (his words) - he got $10 million for Planet of the Apes - Wahlberg still lives close to the old turf.

Indeed, he really does still share a house with his mum (and pays her rent, too), leaving for Hollywood only to earn a crust.

It's more than a simple distaste for Tinseltown and those born with the proverbial silver spoon 'twixt lips: "They need to take it out their mouth and shove it in their ass. Literally." An exception is made for old mate George Clooney with whom he's just finished his third film (Rockstar): "George could get a one-day ghetto pass," he smirks, bestowing high honour.

"But it'd have to be a supervised visit." No, there is a serious purpose behind all this. And while Wahlberg claims, "I feel like I've made up for my mistakes. I don't need anybody else's approval", fact is the actor devotes his downtime to running the local Boys' Club and his own foundation, helping to create opportunities for neighbourhood kids.

"They don't see me as 'Mark Wahlberg movie star'.

They know I'm one of them," he explains. "I didn't have somebody like that in my life. That was why I ended up going to prison. If can inspire any of these kids, then I feel I'm doing some good. I've been put in this position for a reason." The divine thing is no idle musing. "God was always there," he adds. "I just strayed away for a while.

Once I started to refocus my faith, things started to happen." Though there's currently a more obvious void in the poor mite's existence.

"The one thing that's missing in my life is a woman," he mourns, fresh out of an on/off, chalk/ cheese relationship with socialite/ actress Jordana Brewster, currently at Yale.

"I'm the only one in my family who isn't married or has kids. But I haven't really been in the position to meet the right one."

Ladies take note.

Copyright 2001
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