Talking in a Weegie wonderland. ALADDIE TRON THEATRE, GLASGOW UNTIL

JUST when you thought post-modernism had cashed in its chips and gone to the big institute of pseudophilosophy in the sky, along comes Forbes Masson with another of his hilariously ironic deconstructions of the traditional Scottish pantomime.

A self-styled "magical tale from the East (End)", his brilliant Aladdie takes us to a place called Pantoland; which, it has to be said, looks suspiciously similar to Glasgow's Barras market. There, selling three pairs of sports socks for a pound, we find our eponymous hero (he's so poor he doesn't even have a name, he's just a laddie ? awww).

As he tries to provide financial support to the ailing laundry business of his mother Widow Manky, he dreams of hooking up Lorna Sausage, star of popular Tartanian TV soap opera Weegie Region. Problem is, Aladdie's evil uncle, media tycoon and all-round capitalist bad guy Rab Anazer, has tricked Lorna into signing a lifetime contract on the abysmally-written show!

What is to be done? Can Aladdie's only friend, Peely Wally the chipeating pigeon, really get him to the Tartanian studios in time to rescue Lorna?

And can Widow Manky evade the attentions of PC Breid of the sock squad?

It's nail-biting stuff, and not for the faint hearted. Fear not, however, Masson's thrown some jokes in too, and they're not all coming out of the actors' mouths.

There's so much going on in the show that audiences need to keep their eyes well peeled. Otherwise you might miss the card on Psychic Sandra's market stall, proclaiming that it is "closed due to unforeseen circumstances", or the flashing sign in the TV studio requiring quiet from audience as the performers are "oan the telly".

As with previous Masson pantos, the brilliant cast is well up to the severallaughs-a-minute pace. Andy (formerly Andrew) Clark plays Aladdie with verve and an obligatory nod and wink.

A Masson panto without the immense George Drennan would be like George Bush without Tony Blair, and the crooning baddie duly steals the show as the wonderfully named Rab Anazer.

Widow Manky, needless to say, is a panto dame of the miners' welfare club variety, with Robert Carr making Ian Krankie's efforts at the Pavilion look positively feminine.

A word of warning, however: as they become cleverer, the Tron's pastiche pantomimes become less and less accessible to young children. Get a babysitter and take your granny instead.

Copyright 2004 SMG Sunday Newspapers Ltd.
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